I am so hurt, disappointed, and let down right now, that I can hardly think straight. Relationships are hard. In fact, they are an “area” in my life that I continue to struggle with. What to say, how much to say…the truth is a strange thing. It can be spoken out of love, in anger, out of revenge, or even by mistake. There are so many ways we can twist words; some words spoken to suit our selves, some not.

I have a friend in my life that is a complete self absorbed person, she knows this and is absolutely tickled by this fact. Truly it amazes me how she can flit about life and not even notice that there is more to life than her. (This may very well be an understatement.) She will be moving soon. I would say she will be gone in July at the very latest. I have been doing my best to see our friendship through to the time when she leaves.

Today, I disappointed myself. I spoke some words that I have been doing my best to suppress. I really have been trying to make it to the “bitter ends” so to speak, to ride out the storm. Knowing myself, I should have seen the writing on the wall.

It’s my M.O. I have a pattern that I am picking up on with myself. It’s that I lack boundaries. Yes, that’s right, all the misery I feel is of my own doing. So, awareness is half the battle, now I need to work on having some healthy boundaries, so this cycle does not keep repeating itself. Thank goodness for clarity.