I swear I could've written that myself. I told my husband that he doesn't have to understand WHY it's important to me, he just has to understand that it's important. My husband is one of those very fortunate people that gets sexier the older he gets. He'll never understand. I stopped trying to explain it to him and he stopped bitching about it. He went to my last consultation with me and was able to hear everything the doctor had to say. I think he feels a lot better about it now. In fact he may even be a little excited. He's never known me thin. The cost is definately hard to swallow right now, but I figure now is as good a time as any. So hang in there, do your research and hopefully your husband will come around. If not, well, it's easier to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission. And if it's so bad that he leaves you then at least you are on your way to sexy healthiness and you can find someone else. I hope it doesn't come to that though. It'll work out how it's supposed to.

I swear I could've written that myself. I told my husband that he doesn't have to understand WHY it's important to me, he just has to understand that it's important. My husband is one of those very fortunate people that gets sexier the older he gets. He'll never understand. I stopped trying to explain it to him and he stopped bitching about it. He went to my last consultation with me and was able to hear everything the doctor had to say. I think he feels a lot better about it now. In fact he may even be a little excited. He's never known me thin. The cost is definately hard to swallow right now, but I figure now is as good a time as any. So hang in there, do your research and hopefully your husband will come around. If not, well, it's easier to beg for forgiveness than ask for permission. And if it's so bad that he leaves you then at least you are on your way to sexy healthiness and you can find someone else. I hope it doesn't come to that though. It'll work out how it's supposed to.

Thanks for your comment! I thought I was the only one out there for a moment. What was your husband's biggest reservation? Does he have no problem at all with your size? I ask because my husband prefers full figured but not fat women. Sometimes I think about what if I have the surgery and get too small? Will he then no longer attracted to me? But then I have to remind myself why and for who I am doing this, ME. I guess we will just have to find that happy medium.

wow! :lb16: I can dido your husband’s comments with my husband... it is amazing he does not see the relation of how this can aid my weight loss and make me feel good about myself. He thinks I just do not try hard enough. He has never struggled with weight.. he has been thin his whole life. I too have struggled with my weight for about 20 years with the yo-yo diets, latest pill popping remedies and exercise videos, and after having my first child 4 years ago; I am at my maximum weight. :lb20: My max of depression, my max of frustration and my max of options. It is exhausting to have weight be an issue with me every waking moment. I cannot help but think how it has affected my life. I have no pictures in my home of myself because I hate looking at myself especially displayed in frame or on the wall….yuck. My husband’s concern is that we are going to make an investment on this for me and what if I disappoint myself again. He has a friend who had gastric bypass 5 years ago, he lost a lot of weight initially but today he looks like he never had the surgery he is back to how he looked before actually he looks even bigger. I've been slowing depositing money to the OCC to slowly pay for my surgery so it does not impact us financially so that cannot be a reason for him getting upset but I too am scared that I will fail. I hope the lap band procedure will really assistant in my weight loss so he can’t give me that look of "I told you so". :lb11: to you both!

Looks like we have a lot in common. I brought up the subject with my husband last fall and had pretty much the same reaction. I almost had the surgery then but he talked me out of it. Just think I would be close to my goal weight if I had gone through with the surgery then. He also has never had a problem with his weight and looks great. I have heard about my weight problems from him for the last 12 years when I started putting on weight. So, it behoves me why he can not support me in this journey. He just dose not understand and says all I have to do is eat less and exercise more. Of course I know that, I am a nurse for goodness sake. I still struggle with my weight all the time. Oh well I will never make him understand or have his blessing. I need to take care of my health. I am going to be banded on July 14th for myself and not for anyone else. I do have a good support group of friends behind me in this endeavor. I wish you all the best. I am glad for this forum so we can support each other.

Could also have been me!!!! Amazing, people without weight issues all have the same response. I'm doing it anyway and have explained how tired I am. It got worse when I said I was going to Mexico......

I told my husband I wanted the lap-band because it would help with my weight issue, which would help with my self-esteem, which would lead me wanting more sex. He couldn't write the check fast enough.

Most men don't take much into account unless it deals with food, cars or sex. I love my band, and am losing weight everyday. Good luck to you!

I have been talking about it for 2 years, and finally I have booked an appointment. My husband initially shrugged it off.After bringing it up so much he finally said those beautiful words"GO FOR IT "".I thank god he is on my side because I really believe that my weight would cause alot of Health issues in the future. I think once you come to your end of your rope you KNOW you need help, so if your there DO get some HELP, no matter what or who !! Take care of yourself! cause if you don't who will ?