stormy

Oh my god, that cracked me up. I thought with my dirty mind too, I was going- yahoo she was gonna get some. Then it was about food. Ok, I am with ya now. I am scarred about the 21 days of liquids, I dont want to feel like I am starving to death. I think the first thing I would want afterwards is a nice chicken breast sandwhich, but I hear chicken doesnt do well. May have to be careful with that one. Anyhow, enjoy every bite!!

They shouldnt let people get on there when they are stoned out of their mind!!! HAHAHAHHAHA I can't wait to see what I do. Must be some good stuff! 15 days left and I am freaking out!!! STRESSSSS. I have no idea how much I have lost, I found out the scale, if you lean to one side it will give you a different reading. So it dont work. May have to use someone elses scale. I hope I can remain in control, I am so nervous, I can't stand it..

Who are you seeing in Oregon. I called that Dr Kilpatrick, she said that she comes into town 2 x a month or you can go to her. There is also a place in Salem. I am in Oregon and I plan to use her after OCC.

That sounds terrible. Are you any better? Did you call the OCC? I wonder what that is? Please let me know, in case I get it.

Thanks guys, I had a great time making it, you should make one too..

I feel so bad for them. I would hate to have to go through this every year or so. That would make me want to move for good. I hope they choose to leave and be safe. My thoughts are with them. I will be watching the news, praying no one gets hurt.

I made my first video for tracking of my lap band progress. I can't wait to get the surgery so I can make more video's this is fun. Anyone else have one?

for some reason he came home today with a completely different attitude. He helped me give my son and bath last night and actually cooked breakfast this morning. I am impressed. I told him that I was very worried about our marriage and he said that he knows that this weight gain he has, has caused him major health issues. Plus he is in testostrone shots and he said they are messing with his mind. We talked for about an hour and both of us decided that we are doing this band together and we are going to start walking together and trying to be more involved as a relationship instead of just parents. Somewhere "we" got lost. He says he can not be intimate right now, he does not feel good about himself. I completely understand. With time, this will change. I feel horrible being this big too. I have explained to him that I am not going to leave him. We will lose this weight together and get into counseling to deal with the inability to use food as a way to be together. This is a huge change for us. I love him, I know he loves me. But sometimes that is not enough. The trip down there next week, we will be without our child. It will be a time for us to bond again. I look forward to that and the surgery. Wish us luck... Thanks everyone.

I am so happy for you. I can't wait to get mine. Keep us updated. Tel Vix we are waiting for her.

Can you send me the list of things you think I should take with me again, I can't find it.

Yes I have, I have talked to him many times. He just tells me, he doesnt know what to do anymore. He is trying the best he can. He does not know how to handle our autistic child. So he just doesnt try. Leaving me to do everything. And of course being a mom, I just do it, do it all. Isnt that what moms do? I tell him daily how much I love him but he is very closed. He does not handle emotion well so he just puts it away. The only time I see it come out is when the arguing is out of control. That is rarely since we dont argue. We are just silent. We talk but it is like two friends talking. Sometimes we dont talk much at all. He really didnt share his insecurity until the band came up and then he finally said something. Then he told me about all the aches and pains he is having because of his weight. I feel bad for him. He is 285 pounds at 5'8 and he says he is misrible. So far on pre-op he has lost 7 pounds. but he says he is depressed. I cant help him, I am depressed too. What a mess we are. Something has got to get better. Maybe the pre-op diet is making us depressed. We are so used to going out to eat. What do we share now? Oh my god, what a reality check...I guess we were sharing an addiction. How terrible. I called a family counselor, they said when we get back, they will get us in to discuss how we are going to stay away from this behavior. Meanwhile, we have set up one on one meeting this week to discuss our plan. I hope this helps. I need him to get involved with our son, I cant do it alone. It is hard. I need him to be a dad and a husband.

Has anyone every really looked at that? Maybe our spouses feel safe when we are fat. Maybe we are comfortable and then here we are and they have lost the weight and we grow afraid. My husband and I are both getting the band together, but dont let that fool you. Our marriage has been on the edge for a couple years now. Having a special needs child, being over weight and semi-depressed, has caused a huge strain on the relationship. I feel like he dont do enough, he feels like he is pressured all the time. He feels undesireable because he is fat and I feel like I got fat and he dont look at me anymore. So many issues. There is no way to tell if the band can assist with these issues. But self esteem would help. We both sit around and get fat and that is causing us to be depressed. We need this to help us get moving again. I feel like his weight has been a real problem, his eating is a driving force. When he wants to eat, we eat and I admit, I dont argue. I eat too. We have had some serious talks about what this band means to both of us and how serious we are about making a change. But he has made it clear, he thinks I will lose the weight and leave him. I feel the same way about him. I dont feel like he does enough in the marriage. I feel resentful most of the time. I feel like he could send me a check monthly and I could live completely without him. What could change, nothing. We dont have sex, we hardly talk. He doesn't help me with our son. So what would be so different. Maybe that I wouldnt hear him yelling. That would be nice. Ok I would miss having someone to talk to once in a while. But all and all, we have got into a slump of being lost. If we dont get healthy and start communicating about our needs and get some sex going around here, I think I will go crazy. Sorry hate to be blunt, but ladies, I dont think we are born to live without it. Fat or not, give it up! Honey forget the cheeseburger and get over here. It seems crazy I know. Since going on the pre-op diet, I have noticed a difference in his attitude, mine too. we dont focus so much on food. Now we are talking about some real deep issues. Issues that have caused this fat problem. I have the feeling after the surgery, we will be coming home to take a hard look at our lives together. I for one am open to anything that happens good or bad. I am ready to make a change in my life. I think it is important to remember who we are and that life is too short to be unhappy. No matter what, this is the biggest moment of my life and getting the band, is going to save my life, I can work this program. I can learn to live and eat healthy. The pre-op diet has showed me that. Now the real work will begin on the 19th when I get the band. I am hoping we will discover what we need and how to get it. I know we love eachother but I guess we will find out if that is enough. I think alot of his aches and pains will go away with the weight loss and he will be a nicer person, making it a healthier relationship for both of us. I can only hope. Thanks for letting me rant.

I called tmobile, they said it should work, within 24 hours I will get some type of message on my phone to turn it on. I also called the kennell and got the dogs scheduled to stay there, since they seems to want to escape home. Now I just need to decided what to pack everyone. I really dont want to take much of anything down there. Just what I absolutely have to. I really and trying not to stress myself out but I am freaking out. I hate to travel, I dont do it well. I am always afraid I am going to forget something. I know my son will be ok, I think... I am going to miss him, it is like my arm being cut off. I have never left him before. He is not like other kids. I am afraid he wont understand and on top of that he is starting school next week. This was bad timing on my part. I can't wait for all of this to be over. It is overload for me. My anxiety is almost out of control. I am almost on shut down mode and that is when it gets to much and I just decide to stay in bed. I can't do that. I just have to remember to "breath" This is going to be ok. It has to be.I want this. I need this. The funding on the loan should go through tomorrow. Then I think things are set. We will see what happens. Thanks

I'm gonna contact t mobile today and tell them where I am going and see what they say. I only need it from the hotel. I just can't be out of reach from him. I just can't. I also have my home alarm set up to my phone, at least if they cant reach me, they call the police. Thank goodness.

My cell phone is the only link I am going to have to my son. I have TMobile. Is it going to work down there? I have to be able to check on him. I am even at the point of where I dont know if I can do this. I am freaking out. I dont want to leave him. Now my stupid dogs are attempting to dig out of the fence. So I guess I have to check into a kennel for them to stay in while we are gone, so they dont run the neighborhood. This is getting more costly and expensive. We have 22 days until we go into OCC. My friend calls me and tell me how stupid I am for doing this. That he dont think I can stick with it. That I am wasting my money. That I dont have the ability to hold true to the program. I have so much doubt right now. I am scarred. Can I even do this? Can I actually leave my son and travel far from him? What am I going to do? I can't stop now. But yet I am so scarred. What if he needs me, what if he can't handle it? I need my cell phone. I need to be able to call the woman who will be caring for him and I need her to be able to call me. It is so important. I really need to stop this anxiety. I should have scheduled my husband and I seperately. But yet I want him there with me. This is horrible. I'm so tired, I am so scarred. I am so confused. What am I going to do?

We need some new photos? Come on, cough them up!!!

I know exactly how you feel. Yesterday the women were standing around talking about how they eat healthy now and they are losing the weight, and how it is too bad everyone dont do that. ""Some people"" meaning me, have to take extreme measures, it is just too bad ""those"" people, meaning me, dont just learn to eat right. Well I ignored the whole thing. They are fat just like me and maybe they have lost and maybe not but the thing is, they wont keep it off. I think they actually might be threatened by the fact that I am doing this. They can keep doing what they are doing. I have to find my own way. Dont worry about what others talk about. You are who you are and stop beating yourself up. Get back on the wagon!! There is light at the end of the table and those women better be careful, cause what goes around, comes around, ya know?

My husband and I are getting banded together on Sept 19th, this should be a great new way to start our lives together, even though we have been together 10 years. I look forward to more years together, but now thin. Good Luck you guys, welcome aboard.

When do you start taking the Biotin? Do you start taking it right after you get the band? I want to prevent any hair loss. I have great hair, dont want any problems.

Mine starts on the 2nd of Sept. It is kinda kindergarden, he will be going to a life skills class, since he is special needs. But this will be his first time on one of those yellow buses. I am going to cry my eyes out. My little guy is growing up. This class is so important. They are going to work on sign language and verbal language and potty training and setting a schedule and for him to learn how to show what he needs. He will come far in this class. We hope to intergrate him with other kids who are not autistic. I worry about him but if this class works out. He should really grow. I just love him so much, I want to just keep him protected. It is hard to let him go and get on that bus. hopefully I can do it. It is so hard. I guess I will be taking about 5 changes of clothes a day until he figures out the potty training deal. This should be interesting.

Let us know how it goes, I am not far behind you, mine is the 19th of Sept. Anything you can tell me about your experience would help. Have a good time..

I plan on using Dr Kilpatrick, I talked to her already, she seems real nice and said she would come to Portland to do my fill when I am ready. I hope she is as good as I have heard.

Oh my god, I hate when that happens and I have a pooper that would do that too, gross. So far I am starving to death. At least that is how I feel. I feel sick sick sick. TOM came and now I am really sick and since TOM, I have gained back the three pounds I lost, so I am rather upset about this. I am not eating hardly anything and I am not losing. What is wrong with me? I have my slim fast 2 x a day and then my lean cuizine and here I am. I think TOM wrecked it for me. I'm trying not to worry since I have til the 19th of Sept but it makes me mad. Maybe after TOM, it will come off. But so far, I am down right hungry and I feel terrible. Maybe I am catching something, who knows. Ok enough whineing, have a nice day everyone.

The headaches are really bothering me. It is has been about a week pre-op diet and I have only lost 3 pounds and then i get on the scale and it says i gained it all back. I really need a reliable scale. I think it is messed up. I may try to go somewhere, where I can really weigh myself. There has to be somewhere. I can feel in my stomach that I have lost because it is not sticking out as much. But who knows. I feel kinda sick, tired and headachey. I am sure it is withdrawl but not sure what to do about it. I am thirsty, so it is probebly that I haven't had enough water. I keep forgetting. I really wish I could take a nap but my son wont cooperate with that one. Any how, just make sure to drink that water, take it from someone who forgets, it is important.

Are you able to take your pills, I take zoloft, I was just wondering how they go down?