stormy Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 So for all of you that dont remember my family drama, I moved my mother out of my sisters house about three months ago when I found that my sister was living off her soc sec. Well the drama continues, now I found out that my sister is liquidating all my mothers belongings. She would not let us take most of her stuff when we moved her out. Now I find out the trailer mom was living in there, the one she paid for with her soc sec money is now gone. My stomach hurts. I feel gross. I am so angry. All the sudden it felt like my band got tight. This cant be good for me to be this mad. I knew she was gonna do it, I just didnt want to believe it. How could you do that to you own mother? I just want her to pay for what she has done. I am shaking. I called her and left her a nasty message, it did not make me feel any better. Should I go run around the block or something. Should I punch something. Should I cry? My poor mom. I feel like I am going to throw up. I am not sure if I should try to eat something. Maybe I should stay on liquids until I calm down. I have felt like this since last night, when I found out. How do you handle high stress? What is the best thing to do to make sure you dont hurt your band? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelaAnn Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Hi Stormy, I'm so sorry you have to go through all of this stress and drama. I know when I get super stressed, I pretty much have to stay on liquids until it passes 'cause ain't no solid food going down. I hope you feel better and everything gets sorted out. Your sister sounds like a real piece of work. Good Luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
louisem Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 I am so sorry to hear about your troubles. It's an awful situation to have to face. I'm not a psychologist (yet) but here is what my Health Psych text book would say on this subject. 1. It is really important to try to positively re-frame the situation. This is really hard to do in this case, but instead of thinking of what your sister did do, try to focus on the fact that your mom is safe and nothing further can directly impact her. Things are just things and her safety and comfort are what is most important. This is way easier said than done. 2. It is important to ventilate and not ruminate. What this means is that it is good to share your anger and frustration to get it off your chest but try not to dwell on it as much as possible. When you do, it just serves to make you more and more angry and just extends the duration and intensity of negative emotions. A good thing to do is distract yourself with other things. Working out is a good option, so are things like self care ie getting a manicure etc. Now that the psychology mumbo jumbo is out of the way what I really think you should do is go to the police and press charges for theft if at all possible. I hope things get better for you soon! Louise Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smiley Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 I am sorry to hear about your family drama, but unfortunately it is all too common. I think you should stick with liquids or at least very soft foods (mashed potatoes, oatmeal, cottage cheese, etc.) until your band loosens up a little bit. No need to try and force food down only to have it get stuck or come back up. Unfortunately you are a walking testimony to the havoc stress can create for the band. Maybe you could practice your pole dances for hubby and get your mind off of things for a little while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandNewDawn Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Hey Stormy, I am sorry to hear about your family problems. Don't we all just have at least one "way out there" relative that we all have to deal with. It sounds like you knew this "might" happen but just did not want to believe it. Well, now it has happened. Being stressed and upset is not going to put things back they way they were. I'm not a lawyer but unless your sister had your Mom's permission (power of attorney, trustee of her estate, etc.) to sell her things, you might want to contact an attorney to see what your Mom's legal rights are. Sometimes the phone consult is free. Or, try the police like Louise suggested. Those types of "interventions" into what is usually habitual bad behavior on the part of the "relative" can usually end in a no contact type situation though so you might want to think through what you want your relationship with your sister to be at the end of all of this. That is a decision only you can make. Good luck. I know you are in a hard place right now. Take care of yourself. Dawn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tootsie_lou Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Hi Stormy, I just wanted to let you know that we are all thinking about you today. It is so hard when this sort of thing is done by a family member, of all people. Is this in character for your sister? At any rate, hug your beautiful mommy today and, like was said, be glad you got her out of that situation. All your lapband friends are here for you in this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BandDiva Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Stormy, Sorry you are going through this. Love your Mom (and your sister). Even though it may be hard because you don't understand the actions of your sister, it takes less energy to show kindness and love then hatred. I am a firm believer in doing what benefits me and my health. Think about your frame of mind and what you need. Keep focused and don't allow stupidity to make you sick sweetie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stormy Posted June 13, 2009 Author Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 I have pole dancing class tomorrow, that will take my mind off it a while. We have to dance in those 6 inch heels. Yahoo. Thanks everyone for responding. I am going on liquids for a couple days, I hope that will help. My stomach seems to be burning this morning but some cereal is going to help. Maybe some light oatmeal, I will liquify it. This is my last pole dancing class, I am bummed about that but I may sign up for private lessons until I can get to next level. Not sure. I put in my order for a pole at home but they have not ordered yet. Hubby would love me to practice. HA! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AngelaAnn Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Stormy, Sorry you are going through this. Love your Mom (and your sister). Even though it may be hard because you don't understand the actions of your sister, it takes less energy to show kindness and love then hatred. I am a firm believer in doing what benefits me and my health. Think about your frame of mind and what you need. Keep focused and don't allow stupidity to make you sick sweetie! Wow Dana! Your face has totally changed. I did not recognize you! You look great! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BandDiva Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Wow Dana! Your face has totally changed. I did not recognize you! You look great! Thanks! You look great too!!! It is not easy, weight loss is going slow. BUT, everyone I know always says something. I currently have no pants (except jeans) that fit. lol Feeling it in your clothes is always a good feeling! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shiney42 Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 I feel you need to protect your mom, And No one should get away with hurting her! You needed/need to put this matter in the hands of the law. Laws are put in place for the Lawless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJen Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Stormy, I too am dealing with family drama, so I understand, only I am the opposite! I wanna eat! then I get horrible stomach aches! It's an endless battle when it comes to family. Unfortunately all we can do is sit back on the rollercoaster ride. I am gonna try liquids for a couple day, and see if it works, because my tummy is killing me. I will let you know! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jhawkchick75 Posted June 15, 2009 Report Share Posted June 15, 2009 Sorry you are going through that! I am going through a lot of work drama and can appreciate what you are going through. I also when i am stressed get really tight. Stick with protein shakes, soups, cottage cheese etc...until you feel better. No need to PB and make it even more inflamed. Also, I know for me working out helps with stress so keep with the dancing and any other type of workout you can do. I've started running and work out all my aggressions on some certain people that i'm having issues with at work! Good luck and I hope it all clears out! Shelby Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbynnoel Posted June 15, 2009 Report Share Posted June 15, 2009 So for all of you that dont remember my family drama, I moved my mother out of my sisters house about three months ago when I found that my sister was living off her soc sec.Well the drama continues, now I found out that my sister is liquidating all my mothers belongings. She would not let us take most of her stuff when we moved her out. Now I find out the trailer mom was living in there, the one she paid for with her soc sec money is now gone. My stomach hurts. I feel gross. I am so angry. All the sudden it felt like my band got tight. This cant be good for me to be this mad. I knew she was gonna do it, I just didnt want to believe it. How could you do that to you own mother? I just want her to pay for what she has done. I am shaking. I called her and left her a nasty message, it did not make me feel any better. Should I go run around the block or something. Should I punch something. Should I cry? My poor mom. I feel like I am going to throw up. I am not sure if I should try to eat something. Maybe I should stay on liquids until I calm down. I have felt like this since last night, when I found out. How do you handle high stress? What is the best thing to do to make sure you dont hurt your band? ((((((((((((((((((((((((Stormy))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Hugs to you. My heart goes out to you and your mom. I wish I had words that would take everyone's pain away. xo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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