My 6 month update

[ckiki]

Hey everyone, it's been a while since I have been on the board, I read occasionally, but haven't really participated. I have been discouraged with my progress for the last 2 months. I haven't really lost anything..maybe some inches, but that's it. I have had 2 fills, my last one was in April. I really think I need another one, but just haven't had the money to be able to do so..plus I am dealing with the dilemma of getting a passport to go back to Dr. Ortiz's office, or going someone else, but then I really need to have one with flouro to make sure my band is good, and no one in Southern Cali does flouro. I still can eat so much, and I really push it, I sometimes drink right after I eat, sometimes out of habit, or just because I'm thirsty. I get food stuck all the time, and I can't seem to figure out what food it is exactly that gets stuck. It never comes up, it just sits in my chest causing extreme pain. I know I eat to fast and take too big of bites, so that probably has alot to do with it. I am dealing with alot of angry towards my band, like I get angry that I can't eat like a normal person, I get angry because I always have a gassy bloating stomach (which is something I never had prior to being banded) and I am getting angry that I have let myself get off track, I feel like I have failed. I did so good the first 4 months, and I hope that I can get back on track and fast. Another thing, my mom is all over my case about not losing weight, which just makes it worse. She thinks because my cousin who had the lapband and lost 100 months in a year , that I should be doing the same thing, but I keep telling her I may not lose as fast as her..but doesn't seem to understand. I hope that I can get some motivation from all of you wonderful bandsters!!

[dawns]

ckiki,

Wow you have made wonderful progress! You have removed 40 pounds of fat off your body. That is 40 pounds you probably wouldn't have lost all by yourself w/o the band. I think that it is very very easy to get caught up in that comparing game. We all want to be the "best" bandsters and when it looks as if someone is doing better than us then it easy to feel like a failure. I got caught up in that very quickly when I was first banded. And I felt myself getting very discouraged and feeling like I wasn't doing something "correctly". But the thing is, if you really read through the posts, I don't think this has been an easy quick fix for anybody. And it appears to me that almost everyone goes through cycles where you plateau and just don't lose anything for a while. I did. I went about 4 months where I only lost about 2-3 pounds. It drove me crazy, but now I just know that it is going to happen during this journey. Doesn't mean that it won't drive me crazy again and test my will power, but at least I know to expect it and try to have some patience with it when it does happen.

Unfortunately it takes time and money to get you where you need to be with your fills. And until you get there you really have to work with your head hunger/head issues during that time. If you stay the course with the fills you will get there. I am only 3 pounds away from removing 50 pounds of fat from my body and I am almost to my one year mark in Sept. I can guarantee you it wasn't simple, but I think that I have finally learned to use my band as the tool that it is. My mom does the same thing to me only she doesn't have another person to compare me to, however each time she starts questioning why I am not losing more and faster I have learned to say to her "you know I am pretty happy about how much I have lost, and it would mean a lot to me if I know that you are happy for me also"

You did this for yourself for a reason and only you know what that reason is, but I suggest you go back and revisit time and time again why you got your band. And then take baby steps in the other things that you are doing that you don't feel right about. I would suggest dealing with the drinking with meals first. Its a decision that you have to make that you are just not going to run the risk of slipping you band or stretching your pouch by not drinking for 1 hour after meals. You might not be losing right now and you might not have the money or your passport to get to the OCC right now, but you have the power right now to make sure you are not doing something to your band or yourself that could be harmful so that when you do have the money and your passport and you do go get that next fill, you will be able to say to yourself that you are glad you didn't continue to do things that could have hurt your band.

Stick with it because in the end I believe that it will all be worth it. Good luck to you

dawn

[tootsie_lou]

Well said, Dawn!

I can tell you that I stalled at nearly every ten pound loss. At first I would get frustrated, and, like you said, practically rub salt in my wounds by reading on here and another forum about folks running circles around me weight-loss wise. Finally it dawned on me that without the lapband, I would have been as big or bigger than I was when I started. I wasn't doing it on my own. Prior to the lapband, I never had plateaus in my weight loss. I would charge into it all fired up, lose whatever amount it was, remain there for what seems like 30 seconds, and then head right straight back upwards (using of course years and years of bad eating habits). One important thing I have noticed is that when I get "stalled" I realize that at least I can maintain a lower weight for a while. That was something I have never been able to do. I feel like I am in control even if the scale isn't moving as quickly as I want it too. You are in control, too. I feel for you that you have your mom kind of breathing down your neck, adding pressure to "succeed" at the lapband by comparing you to someone else. Do it your way, girl. You already are, and have done great. Someone here recently suggested to try picking up 10 pound bags of sugar to add up to the weight that you lost. Do that. Go to the store and pick up 4 of the 10 pound bags of sugar and see what it feels like. Then set them down and proceed to give yourself a huge pat on the back (I would say hug, but that would just look downright weird--haha). You will make your goal, your way!! Everyone here is rootin' for ya!!

[MyNewLife]

ckiki,

I agree, where would you be now without your band, if anything like I was going I would be that much heavier! You have not done bad for 6 months......You are right, everyone is different and I agree you would benefit from another fill. I had restriction and could really tell on my third fill. I would highly suggest to you logging your food and count your calories. When a food gets stuck, write it down and put the time of day that it got stuck. There are things that I can eat for dinner but not at lunch. I would also suggested HIGH protein foods. Ylou spent good money for this tool to help you and you yourself have said that you know you need to do better. Set a daily goal, ok today I am going to make it and I am only going to eat good foods and stay away fron the NO NO foods, when you make it through that day, set a goal for the next day, one day at a time! Go through your house and removed all "slider" foods if you have too. Lord knows I did, and still have to be really strict with myself. Another thing I would suggest, is get more involved with this board. As you know the support on here is AWESOME! Anytime you need advise, to vent, yell, scream or just read, we are here for you. If it was not for me logging on everday and reading everyones advise, opinions, and seeing that there are people on here that struggle with the same issues as I am, Im not sure I would be were I am..........You are in a slump, everyone has this, but you can pull yourself out of it. If you need to post something for us to help you with everyday, please do, we will help you as much as we can.

Please keep us posted..........and good luck to you!

Carrie

[JudiM]

One way I keep motivated is to read Dr. Ortiz's book - Lapband for life. I usually read a page or two every day - I think I have have been thru that book a bunch of times, but it does keep me motivated. I found the book on Amazon.

Keep up the good work!!!

Judi

[Smiley]

40 pounds in six months time IS wonderful! The fact that you have not gained any weight is also wonderful.

You already know what you are doing wrong because you confessed them all in your post. The good news is that you already know what you are doing wrong. So, pick one of those items to correct this week, and one to correct next week and keep at it until you are back on track. I too am going thru a phase right now where I also get kind of ticked because I really want to eat everything that was just set in front of me, but then I remember that by eating only a small portion of it I will get to eat it at least 2 if not 3 more times.

I'm not going to totally put moms down, but in all honesty, sometimes they just don't get how hurtful their comments can be - as can be true with anyone. They may not mean them to be hurtful, but nevertheless they are. At the present time my mom keeps telling me that I need to eat lots and lots of vegetables because I am low in vitamins D & B12 as well as being anemic. Well, when you only eat 3 cups of a food a day and need the majority of it to protein, lots and lots of vegetables isn't really gonna happen. Sometimes you have to apply the water off of a ducks back theory.

Hold your head up high and face tomorrow as the first day of renewed determination to become the new you. Even though the journey is tough and may be longer than you would like, you won't regret it in the end.

[ckiki]

Thank you everyone for all the kind words, and the motivation to keep going. I have made my lunch for tomorrow, which is something I haven't done in probably 2 months, and I have plans to go to the gym tomorrow, which is also something I have slacked on. So hopefully that will kick my butt into gear and I will start losing again. You guys are right though, without this band I would have gained rather then lost, or by now I would have gained back those 40 lbs PLUS more..so I am very thankful for my band.

[SandraMinnesota]

First, I would say, review your agenda, and decide what is the most important. If it is getting another fill, then start with baby steps to get it done, starting with the passport. Next, I would say, do what you know you need to do, like slowing down your intake, and monitoring bite sizes. If you can find a fill dr in the US, you may find that your health insurance pays for fills. Mine does, and I was totally shocked to find that out. I just went to the clinic, and told them to bill insurance. It was a miracle, but they paid, even though they wouldn't authorize the surgery in the first place. Go figure.

If you get a BAD CLOG, call your dr. in Mexico. You paid for post-op care as well as the surgery. They are prompt at returning calls, and they do care about your success. You should not have to live with pain. (When I called, the dr told me to drink fizzy soda pop to un-clog it, and it worked!)

Then figure out how to deal with anger issues. Joining a support group would be a good choice for that.

Do some positive self-talk. Every day as you are driving to work, tell yourself over and over "I can follow this program and make healthy food choices. I will lose weight. I will avoid junk food."

Hope some of those ideas help. I am 6 months post surg, and lost about 33# so far. I have a new addiction now--clothing purchases. Fortunately, I do it mainly at Goodwill and rummage sales.

Sandra

[Red]

Ckiki,

You are going to make it! You have done so well in those first 6 months. If I do that well when I get banded, I will feel successful. I wanted to let you know, in case you don't already, that you can save some money by getting a passport CARD rather than the passort BOOK. The passport card is $45 and gets you into Mexico and Canada and a couple of other places whereas the book is for international travel, like to Europe. The book is $100. So maybe you could save yourself some money and go with just the passport card for now! Here is the link:

http://travel.state.gov/passport/ppt_card/ppt_card_3926.html

[sawdawg]

It is so good to see you back on the forum we were banded around the sametime and we both have ther bigger band

so I always would read your post glad to see your doing good Hope you stick around I love hearing how things are going

for you