Something you need to show to your husband, mother, friends etc.

[MamaMichelle]

WHAT IT’S LIKE TO ORDER FOOD IN A RESTAURANT AFTER WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY

NOTE: the bulk of this conversation takes place inside the head of a postop WLS patient. Although reading it may take but a minute, the actual thought process may run from a few seconds to a number of minutes.

WAITER: Evening, folks. My name is Steve and I’ll be your waiter tonight. I have a couple of menus for you. (hands over menus) I’d like to let you know the specials for this evening: our soup tonight is lovely, rich Maryland she-crab bisque. Our salad is Cajun Mahi over Caesar Salad and our entrйe is Chicken Piccata with your choice of pasta. Let me get your drinks and I’ll be back to take your orders in just a sec.

HUSBAND: Thank you!

ME (as WAITER hurries off):WAIT! I don’t . . . need . . . a . . . drink . . . (trails off.)

ME (perusing and thinking then, aloud,): Mmm . . . yeah. Okay. Anyway . . .

ME (beginning self-discussion): Well, let’s see – how hungry AM I, anyway? Lunch was five hours so, as the saying goes, “I could eat.†But not too much. Something simple. Something light. Cajun Mahi sounds good, but that’ll be too big and I don’t want to lug leftovers home. Besides, we’ve got too many errands to run, and I’ll end up growing E coli in the takeout container or something. Chicken? Uh-uh. Nope. What if it’s too dry and I can’t get it down? Or worse, it goes DOWN and comes back UP. Ew. No. And with PASTA? Forget it. Where IS the bathroom in this place, anyway? Dammit! Oh, okay. There it is. Better not be a “one-seaterâ€! And I hope no one is in there, just in case. Hell, I’m not proud: I’ll run in the MEN’S room if I have to! I’m not barfing out in the parking lot again. Anyway . . . Hamburger? Steak? Not gonna happen. Maybe I can order something small off the kid’s menu. (looks, hopefully, at hostess) Nah, doesn’t look like that’s an option. She doesn’t look the type to bend the rules.

ME (to WAITER, as he runs by): Steve? Hi. Um, do you ever let adults order from the kid’s menu?

WAITER: Not unless you’re under twelve, honey!

ME (aloud, under breath): I knew it. Dammitall. (looks to neighboring table) And look at the SIZE of that “kid’s†portion, anyway! Dang!

ME (self-discussion continues): Okay, moving on! Breakfast menu? French toast. Pancakes. Waffles. Croissant. Too doughy. Breakfast specials? Nope. Bacon almost killed me last time. And always too much extra stuff, and god knows, I hate to throw food away. Omelet? I could take the extra home, but it won’t reheat very well. I guess the dogs could eat it, but they’re getting too fat as it is.

Maybe an appetizer: shrimp cocktail? Not bad size-wise, but is today one of those days when shrimp will “agree with me� (rubs stomach, pauses, assesses) Mmm, probably not.

HUSBAND (seeing tummy rub): You okay, honey?

ME: Huh? Yeah. Fine. Thanks. (back to inner discussion) Potato skins . . . onion rings . . . French fries . . . fried clams . . . fried chicken . . . fried calamari . . .fried zucchini sticks . . . mozzarella sticks? Nope, too stringy. Anything NOT fried? Chicken Fried Steak? You gotta be kidding me. Oh! How about fish and chips. Still fried, but the fish would be good if I pick off the crust. Nah, the fries and slaw are wasted. Oh, how about a drink to take the edge off? Nope, I’m driving, and you KNOW that one drink goes right to my system!

Side dishes! Let’s see: mashed potatoes. No. Rice pilaf: no. Baked potato: no. Pasta: no. French fries (again?) No. Steamed veggies? Okay, what’s in there? 2 kinds of squash, that’s safe . . . oh, no! Broccoli. Sigh . . . AND cauliflower. That’s great, if I can load it up with butter. Or cheese sauce. Or both . . .

WAITER: So, you folks ready?

ME (sighing): I’ll have a cup of the bisque.

[4mygirls]

It is seriously like this!!!! I know it is going to be an adjustment but...really? This is really scary! I was under the impression that we needed to chew and chew but gosh, I am getting scared. :-?

[snowbird]

It is seriously like this!!!! I know it is going to be an adjustment but...really? This is really scary! I was under the impression that we needed to chew and chew but gosh, I am getting scared. :-?

I'm only like that right after a fill. My husband and I went out this week and ordered appetizer crab cakes and a side of sauteed vegetable, which we split.

You will not be eating a full restaurant meal anymore. Lots of times we bring our meals home and have them for 2 or 3 more meals. We always carry a cooler in the car, and if we are going out and not going home right away, we throw some blue ice in there.

You also get used to what you can eat and what you can't. I won't deny i have had experiences like that, but it isn't always like that.

The plus side is that your restaurant expenses can go WAY down. We went out a couple weeks ago and ordered onion rings and two bowls of stew. Our waiter mixed up our check with the table next to us, another couple. Their bill was $53, ours was $16!

[Clynn]

It is seriously like this!!!! I know it is going to be an adjustment but...really? This is really scary! I was under the impression that we needed to chew and chew but gosh, I am getting scared. :-?

Maybe it's just because I've always been a picky eater but what part of that was scary? There's things on the menu you don't feel like eating for one reason or another so you choose something else. Some restaurants don't offer a very good selection so I don't go back there but lots of restaurants offer side dishes or don't have a problem with ordering off the kid's menu. Over time you'll learn what places are easier to eat at just pre-surgery when you learned that some restaurants have food you like.

[MamaMichelle]

It is seriously like this!!!! I know it is going to be an adjustment but...really? This is really scary! I was under the impression that we needed to chew and chew but gosh, I am getting scared. :-?

Scary? What? I thought it was hilarious!!!

I think it shows how this "tool" inside of us not only controls our stomach's but our minds as well... From what I understand everyone has those foods that they can't eat but old habits die hard and you have to have these internal dialogs with yourself to rationalize between what you "want" and what your band will allow.

As for what Snowbird said about only being this way after a fill this dialog came from someone who was banded in 2005 and has lost 200lbs in less than 2 years, and this post was made about 1.5 years into her journey- for me she is a bandster role model if I have ever seen one!

[snowbird]

Scary? What? I thought it was hilarious!!!

I think it shows how this "tool" inside of us not only controls our stomach's but our minds as well... From what I understand everyone has those foods that they can't eat but old habits die hard and you have to have these internal dialogs with yourself to rationalize between what you "want" and what your band will allow.

As for what Snowbird said about only being this way after a fill this dialog came from someone who was banded in 2005 and has lost 200lbs in less than 2 years, and this post was made about 1.5 years into her journey- for me she is a bandster role model if I have ever seen one!

I know you posted this because it's funny, but when read by someone who hasn't been banded yet, it could sound scary! And besides, no broccoli? No cauliflower? I eat them raw as well as cooked, and they're fine. Clynn wouldn't eat them before she was banded, so it's not going to bother her now to stay away from them!

I did Atkins for three years before being banded, so I guess I'm so used to these mental conversations with myself I don't even think about it anymore. And since my DH is banded too, they aren't just mental conversations!

[WAgal]

Michelle,

That's so funny!!!! Why didn't you use your card from OCC? The one that lets you order from the kids menu? Does that not work here? I didn't order from the kids menu because I had no intention of eating a kid's meal last night (me very bad)... but look at the lesson I learned... I'll be better behaved now... I was just so ravenous and wasn't really thinking...was way too excited. Again ladies... this is a lesson for you to learn not to follow Hanna's bad example!!!

I suspect it will not be like this all the time.. we are still early recovering food addicts... so I am cutting myself some slack... I just have to refocus. And Mackenzie, it's okay to have that candy.. you knew to put it away after just a few pieces. My weakness is tortilla chips with dips.... I really like to munch on them... I'll be revising that since I'm not going to get the needed nutrition I need to stay healthy.

Be blessed today! It's okay... we will get over yet another day!

[4mygirls]

I guess what is scary about it is the unknown. I unlike you have not had my surgery yet and I am thinking worst case scenarios. Always knowing where the bathroom is so I don't have to vomit in the parking lot. Scary...that is the word describes something that you fear. I fear that I am going to get the band, feel crappy all the time, not be able to eat out because nothing will "agree" with me or when I do eat I will end up PBing.

Wow-Just my opinion. Maybe after I have the surgery I will laugh my a$$ off about it.

[snowbird]

I guess what is scary about it is the unknown. I unlike you have not had my surgery yet and I am thinking worst case scenarios. Always knowing where the bathroom is so I don't have to vomit in the parking lot. Scary...that is the word describes something that you fear. I fear that I am going to get the band, feel crappy all the time, not be able to eat out because nothing will "agree" with me or when I do eat I will end up PBing.

Wow-Just my opinion. Maybe after I have the surgery I will laugh my a$$ off about it.

Just remember, as someone else on another forum said, "nothing tastes as good as being thin."

[MamaMichelle]

Just remember, as someone else on another forum said, "nothing tastes as good as being thin."

Very True... My personal motto is "Thin tastes better" you can fill in anything that you want after that (i.e. Thin tastes better than that cookie)

Hanna- The story above is not mine, it was forwarded to me from a woman who has been banded almost 3 years. Obviously I have only eaten 1/4 cup of salad since being banded almost 3 weeks ago. I have no idea how shrimp or chicken will work with my band, and I have never PB'd yet so no need to scope out where the bathroom is, yet lol!

[Alana]

I also think it's important to consider what restaurant this person was eating at. It sounded like a place with not many healthy options. I'm sure there are plenty of places you can eat after being banded that will offer healthy alternatives.

All in all, good to know. May 9th, here I come!

[jetdeck]

Michelle,

Funny post! I've been thinking about all these things since nobody knows I have been banded... I'm trying to figure out how I'm even going to eat in front of anybody, now I'll really become even more of a closet eater...lol!!

Just like everything worth achieving in life...there is always a little give and take and adjustments to make.

SJ

[MamaMichelle]

I want to see Michelle weigh herself again! What an inspiration! Good job at the 33 pounds!

I do weigh myself daily but only update my ticker once a week, which will be tomorrow... I lost 6lbs the first week and 6lbs the 2nd week but since I am on my period right now and I have been working out with weights for the first time this week I am thinking that the water weight and new muscle weight will prevent me from having another big loss this week but who knows!

I was watching "The Biggest Loser" last night and was thinking that those people are working out 6-8 HOURS per day and some of them only lose 1-2lbs in a week, so if I can match that and lose 1-2lbs with a little exercise and mostly by watching my diet then I think I am doing pretty good!

We shall see!

[Clynn]

Just remember, as someone else on another forum said, "nothing tastes as good as being thin."

Actually, someone told me the bacon chocolate bar tastes as good as being thin, but I'm skeptical.

4mygirls if you end up feeling as bad as you described then your band is too tight. Luckily there's a simple fix for that - get an unfill. I had about a week feeling like that and getting an unfill took care if it right there.

[4mygirls]

Thanks and noted Clynn. I really am getting excited about the whole thing!!!

[Kim2BSlim]

You are so funny Michelle!

You are doing awesome with your working out! I am so proud of you! >

[MamaMichelle]

You are so funny Michelle!

You are doing awesome with your working out! I am so proud of you! >

Thanks Kim!

Just got back from running while my son rode his bike, we went to a smaller park that's only .25 miles from our house but once we got there I did 30 laps around the half-basketball court they had there, I ran 4 laps then walked 2, ran 4 laps then walked 2... I did 5 sets of that and really wasn't that tired! Now I get to relax before Big Brother comes on tonight- I think I read on your myspace that you are a BB fan too!

[WAgal]

Very True... My personal motto is "Thin tastes better" you can fill in anything that you want after that (i.e. Thin tastes better than that cookie)

Hanna- The story above is not mine, it was forwarded to me from a woman who has been banded almost 3 years. Obviously I have only eaten 1/4 cup of salad since being banded almost 3 weeks ago. I have no idea how shrimp or chicken will work with my band, and I have never PB'd yet so no need to scope out where the bathroom is, yet lol!

oic...i actually got that after reading everyone's post here... this whole experience is an adventure. i am already saving on our food bill at home and eating out! I didn't realize it but between myself and husband alone we could eat a lot! btw, he has been joking about getting a lapband too... he would never qualify, his bmi is only 29 and he has no co-morbidity health issues. he's just getting older and not exercising and working too much... desk job. so his belly has gotten bigger in the last couple of years, and it's not a beer belly either.. i dunno what it is quite frankly???

keep up with the good fight and thanks for everyone's posting... i really enjoy learning about all this that we are going through together and our elder bandsters feedback.

blessings,

Hanna

[Paula Bee]

I do weigh myself daily but only update my ticker once a week, which will be tomorrow... I lost 6lbs the first week and 6lbs the 2nd week but since I am on my period right now and I have been working out with weights for the first time this week I am thinking that the water weight and new muscle weight will prevent me from having another big loss this week but who knows!

I was watching "The Biggest Loser" last night and was thinking that those people are working out 6-8 HOURS per day and some of them only lose 1-2lbs in a week, so if I can match that and lose 1-2lbs with a little exercise and mostly by watching my diet then I think I am doing pretty good!

We shall see!

I agree.. I hope to be with you there soon.

Regardless, I find the Biggest Loser extremely motivating and get great satisfaction from each individual's success.

Paula

[Kim2BSlim]

Thanks Kim!

Just got back from running while my son rode his bike, we went to a smaller park that's only .25 miles from our house but once we got there I did 30 laps around the half-basketball court they had there, I ran 4 laps then walked 2, ran 4 laps then walked 2... I did 5 sets of that and really wasn't that tired! Now I get to relax before Big Brother comes on tonight- I think I read on your myspace that you are a BB fan too!

Way to go!! I am a huge BB fan, but I couldn't get into it this time while watching American Idol too.