Confessional

[Dontondan]

I haven't been on in a while and am in need of a good "kick in the pants" to get back on track. I guess this is my cry for help or at least acknowledgement that I have a problem, so I can defeat what is eating me (or what I have been eating). I have a very stressful home life dealing with disturbed foster children and for the past few months have not been able to go out in public much because of their poor behaviors, plus I can't leave them with my hubby as he "loses it" with them and that stresses me even more. Therefore I have not been going to the pool to do my exercise (which I love) and have been staying at home and cooking crap and eating everything I can get my hands on. I have been lucky as I haven't gained any weight back, but I am really worried about it. I have to eat by myself or I get so stressed by the kids that I PB everything, but this only happens when I am stressed. Maybe I just need a kind word or some supportive ideas. I have a vacation coming up in December and have just had a getaway weekend to Vegas a few weeks ago (by the way, my eating was under control and I was very relaxed while I was gone). I am so afraid that I have stretched my pouch, and have plans on getting a flouro at OCC in December after my cruise. Otherwise I am biting the bullet and writing about this and getting it out into the open so that I can't "hide" my indiscretions any longer. I am also planning on going down to meet the girls in Portland next month if I can get someone to watch the kids for me. I miss all of you out there and need some encouragement. HELP!

Donna

[Jann]

Is there any back up provided to foster parents by the State to allow some time relief throughout the week? My hairdresser is a foster parent and she has resources to call to come over when she needs an hour break now and again. Do they do that State-side?

Given your circumstance with your foster children and the stress you are under I really don't have anything constructive to offer to you but I did want you to know I think about you, admire you and know you will overcome this.

Jann

[Dontondan]

Yeah, I do have support, but sometimes it is not enough. It is harder dealing with other peoples children as we have to do everything by the book and sometimes it is so frustrating. My own child was a piece of cake and I usually have older teens, right now I have a 7 year old and a 12 year old and it is more difficult for me than the teenagers!!! Never thought I would say that one! You cannot reason with a 7 year old!!!

[Jann]

Yeah, I do have support, but sometimes it is not enough. It is harder dealing with other peoples children as we have to do everything by the book and sometimes it is so frustrating. My own child was a piece of cake and I usually have older teens, right now I have a 7 year old and a 12 year old and it is more difficult for me than the teenagers!!! Never thought I would say that one! You cannot reason with a 7 year old!!!

I meant so that you could get to the pool and catch a break. I just don't know how you do it. I'm not sure I could cope having read your posts in the Portland thread. God bless your heart.

Jann

[nothereanymore]

Since you can't get out much and you're dealing with stress can you try yoga at home? There are many good yoga tapes out there and yoga helps you deal with the stress. Also try to get a good breathing tape. Dr. Weil has a good one and that can really help you control your stress and alleviate some of the swelling.

I also lock my bedroom door and dance away my stress, can’t imagine what I looked like doing it at 275 pounds, but its better now. It was a great way for me to start liking my body and learning how to control it, I also bought the belly dancing tapes; those are really relaxing as well and beautiful to work out too. If you have to, do it when the kids are in bed or watching their favorite TV shows.

Make some time for you, and don’t let what you cannot control – control you. You’ll be fine, we all have the bumps in our banded life, but its not the end of it all. Also I just was on a cruise last month – make sure to plan some fun excursions, they generally have good exercise classes and I kept up on my sets while I was cruising.

My thoughts are with you, you’ll make it through just fine. These are the things that make us stronger and better people.

[Dontondan]

I know this too will pass. I will try and look up some yoga tapes on Netflix this evening and see if I like it. This kiddo doesn't sleep much though and it is usually one of my most stressful times is trying to get him to go to sleep and then he is up bright and early every morning......UGH!!! I have some great things planned for the cruise. I am going snorkeling by myself since my hubby doesn't meet the weight requirement!!! LOL! I can do it now!!! Apparently you have to be under 250 pounds to snorkel? Is that stupid or what? I also hope to see some gray whales down in Baja on their migration. That would be so cool. Next year we will probably go back to the Carribean for our vacation and I want to go horseback riding in the surf...never could make the weight limits for that in the past. Oh, my good thing is that I got 2 formal outfits this week that are a size 16 and they fit beautifully. Maybe a zip-line next....

[Kittycat]

Big Hugs!!

I am sorry it's been so difficult for you...and we know that you are doing the best you can. Any moment you can grab for yourself is precious and if you can catch a swim.

No need to confess, we all have busy lives and sometimes they go upside down...I hope things get better for you!!

Take care sweetie!

[Jann]

I know this too will pass. I will try and look up some yoga tapes on Netflix this evening and see if I like it. This kiddo doesn't sleep much though and it is usually one of my most stressful times is trying to get him to go to sleep and then he is up bright and early every morning......UGH!!! I have some great things planned for the cruise. I am going snorkeling by myself since my hubby doesn't meet the weight requirement!!! LOL! I can do it now!!! Apparently you have to be under 250 pounds to snorkel? Is that stupid or what? I also hope to see some gray whales down in Baja on their migration. That would be so cool. Next year we will probably go back to the Carribean for our vacation and I want to go horseback riding in the surf...never could make the weight limits for that in the past. Oh, my good thing is that I got 2 formal outfits this week that are a size 16 and they fit beautifully. Maybe a zip-line next....

Uhm, hubby and I go snorkling usually twice a year. He's never been turned away. We've snorkled all of Mexico pretty much, Australia's Great Barrier Reef, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Belize, Florida, Jamaica - you get the picture. Hubby is 350 pounds and his weight has never been an issue. I have no idea why they would have a 250 pound rule??? It sounds like you will have a beautiful trip!! Definitely something to look forward to.

Jann

[CottonwoodAZ]

I Too have foster Children and sleep is almost always an issue for them. We added a fish tand and a water fountain to their rooms and it really has worked. These children have been through so much and is manifests in there sleep. Keep your head up and know you are doing a great thing! Find respite!!!

[julieburns]

I haven't been on in a while and am in need of a good "kick in the pants" to get back on track. I guess this is my cry for help or at least acknowledgement that I have a problem, so I can defeat what is eating me (or what I have been eating). I have a very stressful home life dealing with disturbed foster children and for the past few months have not been able to go out in public much because of their poor behaviors, plus I can't leave them with my hubby as he "loses it" with them and that stresses me even more. Therefore I have not been going to the pool to do my exercise (which I love) and have been staying at home and cooking crap and eating everything I can get my hands on. I have been lucky as I haven't gained any weight back, but I am really worried about it. I have to eat by myself or I get so stressed by the kids that I PB everything, but this only happens when I am stressed. Maybe I just need a kind word or some supportive ideas. I have a vacation coming up in December and have just had a getaway weekend to Vegas a few weeks ago (by the way, my eating was under control and I was very relaxed while I was gone). I am so afraid that I have stretched my pouch, and have plans on getting a flouro at OCC in December after my cruise. Otherwise I am biting the bullet and writing about this and getting it out into the open so that I can't "hide" my indiscretions any longer. I am also planning on going down to meet the girls in Portland next month if I can get someone to watch the kids for me. I miss all of you out there and need some encouragement. HELP!

Donna

Donna I've missed you. I am sorry life has been rough for you. I am sure with all you do it can certainly throw a wrench in your ability to take care of YOU!! Remember though you can't do it if you don't. those foster kids are so lucky to have you Donna and in order to keep up with them please put yourself first sometimes. Get that hour or 2 relief you can from someone and go do something just for you. Even a nice walk around the mall or perhaps even a pedicure. Special people like you are rare these days and I personally thank you for taking on such challenges with these needy children. think about it, several years down he road many of these kids will be looking back and have you and your family pictured in their minds as someone who gave a damn. You are a pivotal person in their lives whether it seems like it now or not.

Please make the time and arrangements necessary to join us here in Portland for the get together. I wish their was some way I could help you, too bad you are not closer to me. Today is a new day and I am so glad you came to the forum and reached out. Many times we suffer in silence and think this is how we should be but remember we are here for each other, through thick and thin, literally!!

:lb4: because your are so important to so many Donna.

[jhawkchick75]

Uhm, hubby and I go snorkling usually twice a year. He's never been turned away. We've snorkled all of Mexico pretty much, Australia's Great Barrier Reef, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Belize, Florida, Jamaica - you get the picture. Hubby is 350 pounds and his weight has never been an issue. I have no idea why they would have a 250 pound rule??? It sounds like you will have a beautiful trip!! Definitely something to look forward to.

Jann

I have heard of weight limits for scuba diving because of the pressure on your lungs, but not snorkel. Wonder if the place got it confused??

A cruise sounds so fantastic! I've got some friends trying to talk me into one in May, but with all this i'm not sure I can afford it. Someday though!!!!!

[Dontondan]

Thanks all of you! I am glad that I was missed! Gives me the warm and fuzzies! Having another rough day----kids are off of school again, some holiday. Tomorrow I have respite for a few hours, but have several trainings and meetings (for the kids) that I have to attend to. I have respite in the works so that I can come down to Portland for the get-together.....am so looking forward to that and my hubby is so supportive of whatever I have to do, I am so lucky in that respect. He is fortunate as he has his work and gets away from home every day for 10 hours! I get my "me" time every Thursday evening when he watches the kids for me and I get to go to the casino alone and play. This is my only "vice" and I get triple points on Thursdays! Yay!

As far as the weight limit on the snorkel trip, it is through the cruise line and I think it is because of the Catamaran that takes us out to the site. I have been snorkeling many times before and love it even when I was heavy, but my husband is not a big fan of it and would just sit on the boat anyways.