Getting frustrated even tho I read this can be normal

[JenniferJS]

I am down 15 lbs. Just under 10 lbs was pre op loss. The post op liquid diet provided the other 5 lb loss.

I've read on here that it is normal to not lose before your first fill. I've been able to eat pretty much everthing and in any quantity. The coordinator (Lori) and others have said that there will be very little restriction and I will be able to eat pretty normally during this time {after the liquid diet ends and before you are allowed your first fill}. I'm not too worried about strectching my pouch, as no one (clinically involved) ever said or provided information saying that was a concern during these few weeks. But in the back of my mind, of course, I think I'm failing this band just like every other attempt at weight loss in the past 20 years.

I see some on here that have lost 10 additional or even 20 additional pounds before their first fills. I am so jealous! I feel completely normal except the few times I feel food in my esophagus but it just takes a few minutes for it to finally pass thru. I have had the saliva build up and have to spit for periods of time. This can happen with my first bite of something so its not that I'm stuffed to the gills. Its not always. More often than not, I can eat pretty much the same as before banding. Yes, I'm making decent food choices. Not perfect but not gluttonous, either.

I want to hear from everyone but I'm especially interested in people like Lisa and others who are at maintenance or with very little left to lose. Were you just gung ho from the beginning? Just dropping weight even before your first fill? Are the people who didn't lose before their first fill the ones who are only at 30-40% of their weight loss goals?

One other issue - I am drinking with my meals! I know its a huge no no...but its almost impossible to get in your liquids if you are to wait 30 minutes before you eat and an hour after you eat. Thats 6 hours of no drinking a day! (1.5 hours of no drinking due to meal time limitation on liquid intake plus 30 minutes meal time itself x3 is how I get 6 hours.)

I am drinking because I am thristy and it is hard to ONLY have solids...how do you guys deal with that? I guess I"m washing food thru my band and that is why I can eat normally? As well as no fill?

I just want to feel good again, like I did the first 5 weeks (2 weeks pre op and 3 weeks post op was WONDEFUL!) I feel back to "big ole Jen just eating away!"

OH AND I KNOW THIS IS A TOOL A TOOL A TOOL A TOOL AND NOT MAGIC! Please do not reply with that. So far I feel ZERO ASSISTANCE from this tool.

I hope others are nodding and saying..yep, I've been there...but now filled, I'm dropping weight and feel silly for having such little faith in this band...